Pass the test, t-taste the flesh (scrooge x magica)

[blackmagicduck]

 One of the disadvantages of immortal youth was that it sometimes limited her options. If she wanted something fresh and young, she needed to be where the fresh and young people where, and gods, their music was awful. What happened to the good old days of violins and organs?

So imagine her surprise as she viewed the buffet to find one snack that looked older than most. She raised an eyebrow - he didn't seem to be in any midlife crisis. The exact opposite, in fact - like if he had any real choice, he wouldn't be here. Well... she could fix that for him.

She licked her lips, and then made her way across the room. A gorgeous beauty like her, it was like parting the ocean waves with a hand. She was by his side within seconds, sizing him up.

Nice, very nice. He even smelled delicious.

"Congratulations, you're the most miserable person here, and I think that includes the janitor."

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[richestduck]

If Scrooge had been aware that he was lying in a vampire's lap, he would've probably snickered at the irony.

As it was, he laid there for several minutes, twitching periodically from muffled hiccups. Then he sat up on one elbow for a moment to have a sip of wine without spilling it in her lap.

...Huh. He'd thought he was almost finished. Oh well.

He took three gulping swallows, running his tongue over his beak the moment he finished as he set the near-empty glass down. He then laid back down in her lap, settling in to enjoy the movie. As he licked his beak a second time, he wasn't able to hide the hic!

[blackmagicduck]

Perhaps it was best to leave him as it was when it came to the wine. No need to have him upchucking all over her. Just let it sink in so he could unwind and forget. She hummed quietly as she pet him.

The count had gotten the woman in his clutches, but as he drank her, the sun came, and he vanished in a puff of smoke, dying. The woman died too, just as her husband came home to embrace her. The film ended on a shot of the count's decaying castle, with his reign of terror at an end.

[richestduck]

"It's a bit o' a bittersweet--hic!--ending," Scrooge noted, the wine mellowing him out significantly. "Hic! Nobody really--hic!--wins in all this."

He unleashed a rather impressive belch, idly patting his stomach for a moment before sitting up.

"Ye got another--hip!--movie fer us?" he slurred out.

[blackmagicduck]

"I could put on another one," She watched him, wondering how much longer he would last until he was conked out.

"Are you sure you're not too tired?"

[richestduck]

"Not tired at--hiccup!--all." He picked up his glass to swallow the dregs, swallowing mostly air in the process. "Ah could wash another--hilp!--er two. Hic-hilp!"

He tilted his head to glower at his belly before a particularly obnoxious hiccup prompted him to sit back on one hand with a dopey smile on his face. Even then, he wasn't quite steady as more of the alcohol was absorbed into his bloodstream. He squinted at the bottle, trying to decide whether or not it would be worth pouring himself one more glass to try and wash down his hiccups.

[blackmagicduck]

"Very well. Stay right there." She gave him a quick kiss. "I'll be right back."

She did have more vampire films - a whole collection - though she doubted he'd make it far into the next one. Next up came up with the first officially licensed Dracula adaptation, the role the actor would be stuck with for the rest of his life. It took a few minutes to change the reels, and she glanced at him as she did so to make sure he was all right.

[richestduck]

He was incredibly relaxed and had even forgotten his earlier melancholy. He was safe here in this little slice of heaven away from the world. Not even his own sorrows could reach him.

Hic! His entire body jerked at that, and he sat up straight to reach for the bottle. Hiccup! It was pure luck that he managed to grab it before he belched and poured himself the last glass. Then it all went down the hatch in a couple of gulps.

He settled back down, intending to rest his head on her lap, but she wasn't there. Instead, he flopped over on is side, lying there temporarily confused, before he closed his eyes and started snoring. That last sound was only interrupted by a periodic loud hiccup which caused his entire relaxed body to twitch in response.

[blackmagicduck]

As the film began to play, she returned to the mattress and wasn't surprised by the sight greeting him there. She chuckled, and then knelt down beside him, glad to get her meal.

She undid his collar, leaned down, and sunk her teeth in. She couldn't risk puncturing too deeply and him waking up, but she wanted a deep enough drink that would last two weeks.

[richestduck]

He re-opened his eyes at the distant feeling of her teeth puncturing his neck. He blinked at her in confusion. He opened his mouth...

HICCUP!

...and laughed before allowing sleep to reclaim him.

[blackmagicduck]

She froze when she saw his eyes open... but he was out like a light. Yikes, that had been too close. Maybe when he woke up, she could convinced him it was just a dream, if he didn't already think so. Next time, she'd have to wait longer before biting - she'd been too eager this time, too greedy for his blood to pay attention to time.

Just like the film. Har har har.

Still, she resumed drinking until she had her fill. When finished, she fetched a blanket for his body, waiting patiently.

[richestduck]

Sure enough, he woke late the next morning, hungover but sober. He sat up, a hand to his head as he gritted his teeth.

Gods, he'd told her he was going to mind his intake...!

[blackmagicduck]

"Easy there." Magica cooed, her fingers on his back. "Good morning, darling."

[richestduck]

"Morning," he told her. He forced his eyes open at half-mast, feeling exhausted and sore. (He must've been sleeping at an odd angle if his neck felt like this...) "Not sure if 'good' is the word I'd use for it. I'm sorry."

[blackmagicduck]

She snuggled up to him from behind.

"You had a god time, there's no need to apologize."

[richestduck]

"I do when you have to deal with the aftermath," he told her. "I told you I was going to mind my intake, and I didn't."

Those were hours they could've spent together enjoying themselves. If not with the movie, then maybe something more carnal.

[blackmagicduck]

"As long as you were happy, it was a good evening."She nuzzled him affectionately.

"I have no regrets and no anger. And if I don't have any, you shouldn't have any."

[richestduck]

"But you're always giving and I'm always taking," he said, getting to the crux of why he was upset.

He wasn't pulling his weight in the relationship. (She was going to get sick of it. She was going to leave sooner or later...)

[blackmagicduck]

"I can't ask you to give me anything when there's nothing I want." She came around him, settling on his lap.

[richestduck]

"But there has to be something," Scrooge desperately protested.

[blackmagicduck]

"Isn't that itself a catch?" She faced him, looking right in his eyes.

She debated if she needed to enchant him for this. Would it always return to this subject.

"If I tell you I want something, you would think I only wanted you for that, and it would destroy the world we created here together."

[richestduck]

"It's...not the same."

It was the same but it wasn't and it made his head pound even more.

"I feel like I'm taking advantage of your generosity. I don't want to be like all those moochers."

[blackmagicduck]

She curled one arm around his neck, and pressed her forehead to his.

"Do you give anyone else your time and your thoughts like you do with me?"

[richestduck]

He shook his head slightly. He'd once been able to talk freely with Beakley, but...he'd basically shut down after he'd lost Della. That and they were employer-employee now. There were lines in the sand that shouldn't be crossed.

[blackmagicduck]

"Then you're already giving me something valuable." She traced his beak with her finger. "Something you give to no one else. You give it willingly... you give it freely. You give me the real Scrooge McDuck."

[richestduck]

"I suppose that's true," he admitted, "but it doesn't seem like much of a gift for you."