happilyeverbeginning | toss a coin to your witcher (dumb duck trio)

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toss a coin to your witcher (dumb duck trio)

"She used her dark magics on my husband, and now he sees her shadow in the mirror every night!"
"He killed an entire farm-hands livestock, all for his own twisted amusement."
"They have a garden full of statues that were once children, now frozen in time forever..."

As Scrooge McDuck - world's richest duck, famed adventurer, and also expert monster hunter - continued his research into the "mages of the mountain", he found each new rumor was more outlandish than the last. Sure, there were a few things that were consistent - the two were twins, beautiful in their own way, and fiercely loyal to one another - but after that, each new round of gossip could make them sound like petulant children or gods themselves. Whatever troubles the villagers were having, be it bad weather or failing crops, it was surely the fault of the De Spell family.

And yes, perhaps the manor of the twins - lofted right into the side of the highest hill, with decaying greenery entwined all around the massive stone steps - was a little something out of a gothic horror novel. Dark colors, eerie structure, and maybe a cracked gargoyle or two. The cry of a raven could be found in the distance. But if these twins were as powerful as so whispered, why couldn't they afford to fix the twisted rafters from the windows, or cover the drafts from moldy holes? The land itself was probably pricey property, and many would pay handsomely for it... if some particular vermin was exterminated.

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Scrooge and the spirit weren't alone, but this third party wasn't planning on interfering anytime soon. Even if he wasn't a coward by nature, his mistress had ordered him only to watch and report back.

Ratface made himself small and scrawny in the shadows, only wanting Scrooge to succeed so that these pesky villagers left his family alone. Still, he was much like the twins in that he wasn't entirely sure the man would make it. He held his breath as he waited, wondering if the creature would go into the here-after with just a few pleas.

Scrooge smiled at her. "Please. Let me lead you home."

She slowly extended her hand, looking like she was going to take his. Then fury filled her face as she saw something behind him. She started screeching, knocking Scrooge aside.

He rolled with the blow, ending back on his feet. He saw the brother-in-law with a preacher who was shakily attempting some sort of exorcism.

"No, no, goddammit! You need to get out of here!"

He was so close! She wanted to let go and move on -- he could see that -- but these absolute morons...!

Ratface clicked his tongue, not terribly surprised. Of course the villagers wanted to take credit for "saving" the village, and probably not wanting the pay the outsider if he couldn't get rid of the Spells.

He had been instructed to leave things be... but... well. If this man could well and truly keep his mistress safe? Familiars and loyalty went hand in hand.

With a nervous and shaky breath, he took to the sky, flying faster than the creature could shamble. He intended to merely give the priest a good scare - flap wings in his face, maybe rip up a bible with his talons - and see how much time that could buy.

The preacher was completely unprepared for the assault. He threw up his hands and shouted in fear, interrupting his prayers.

Scrooge ran past the noonwraith, coming to a stop between her and the idiotic duo. He turned his head slightly. "Run as fast as you can back to the village!"

"It needs to die!" the brother-in-law shouted.

"She's already dead!" Scrooge snarled, keeping one eye on the noonwraith as she considered her options. He stepped this way and that to keep between the two factions. "If you don't leave now, not only will I let her have you but I'll make sure you won't be able to get away!"

"You wouldn't -- !"

BANG! Fast as lightning, Scrooge had drawn his revolver and fired at the dirt less than an inch away from the shrieking man's foot. He hated wasting a good bullet (particularly one of the silvers), but right now he had no other options. The situation was spiraling out of control.

The brother-in-law backpedaled as fast as he could.

"For the last time, get out of here!" Scrooge snarled.

The brother-in-law fled, leaving the preacher with Ratface.

Ratface didn't like the sound of gunfire - the speed of a spell versus a bullet was often unfair - so he dove to the ground, covering his head. He was no brave hero, he just wanted to get this over with! When a second shot didn't follow, he sighed with relief, lifting his head.

"... Well, what are you waiting for?" He couldn't help but snark. "A pretty please?"

"DEMON BIRD!" the preacher shrieked before racing after his companion.

Scrooge holstered the weapon. "Finally!" He cast a quick glance at Ratface. "You'd best fly off, too. If I can't settle her back down, it's going to get messy."

Eh, he'd heard worse. With that, Ratface made to duck behind whatever shelter he could find.

"No can do. I was ordered to observe. Get on with it, 'expert'."

"Then give me space."

Scrooge turned back to the noonwraith. He held up his empty hands to her.

"He's not worth it," Scrooge told her.

The noonwraith seethed, its torn clothing roiling about her.

"Marzia!" he called. "Marzia Biancardi, listen to me!"

There was no hint of recognition, no spark.

The last shreds of Marzia Biancardi were gone.

His heart broke as the noonwraith focused its efforts on him. He drew his revolver again, aiming for the center of its forehead.

"I'm sorry, lass. I really am."

BANG! BANG BANG BANG BANG!

Ugh, that sound again! Ratface winced, ducking his head under his wings again. But he couldn't hide forever, and so he forced himself to look through his feathers and through the noise, to see if the mortal man had made it - or been massacred.

The last wisps of the noonwraith's essence swirled past Scrooge. His head was bowed, the revolver lowered and at his side.

"Well then. That's a result for your masters, eh?"

There was nothing left save some ectoplasm and mystical dust. Valuable potion ingredients, true, but the cost to obtain them...that was too high.

Ratface raised his eyebrows, genuinely surprised. He walked out slowly to observe the area and make sure all was safe. The girl's loss was a pity to be sure, but ultimately, he could only care about himself and his mistress.

"So it is. I'd think a man at your age would be used to these sort of things." But with a shrug, he opened his wings, ready to take to the skies.

Scrooge's head snapped to Ratface, glaring. "I am used to it, but that doesn't mean I like it!" His beak curled in disgust. "If I ever perform a job like that and it doesn't affect me, that's when I need to pack it in. Otherwise it might be innocent people like your masters who end up gone!"

He pointed towards the last remnants of the noonwraith.

"If your masters want that, they can have it. Call it part of their fee. Should fetch them a pretty penny if nothing else." He spun on a heel and started to walk.

Edited 2022-02-10 13:31 (UTC)

Ratface blinked rapidly, but again, shrugged it off as he walked to the remains to pick what his mistress would like. Yelling and anger was quite normal for him, and he only ever really feared it from the twins.

"Innocent people end up gone all the time. What do you think happened to the elder Spells?"

Magica had said they died. She didn't say how.

"Then why do you care if your current masters die if the death of innocents means nothing to you?" Scrooge snapped, still walking. "They'll be dead sooner or later anyway. Then you'll find new masters and move on."

"A master and a familiar's bond isn't so simple." He tried picking up one of the items in his claws. "If she dies, I'm out too. Innocence and guilt are things beyond birds. We just know who we like. You mortal ones get hung up on so much when time is so short."

With a flap of his wings, he was above the ground. "But I suppose they will be happy you aren't dead yet."

Scrooge snorted. "Doesn't matter. I'm just another mortal to you and them. If they don't want me to come by to find out their fee, they can just send a note through you, I suppose."

"I didn't say they didn't want you to come back." Ratface merely reported the facts as he saw them. "But I've been away too long as it is."

With that settled, so as he saw it, he took off to the skies.

Scrooge let the familiar fly off as he headed towards the village. He only stopped once on the path there, and that was to bend over and retch out the awful feelings of effectively murdering an innocent soul.

Maybe it didn't matter to the De Spells and their familiar, but it mattered to him. Particularly when he remembered how she'd reached out towards him and he'd seen a glimpse of how she'd looked when she was alive.

What did he expect though? Not everyone could see the dead like him.

Edited 2022-02-10 20:05 (UTC)

Ratface swiftly returned to the rotting manor, much to Magica's relief, and relayed the story to the twins without missing a single detail. While Poe stored away the treasures, the two had a lot to think about. Oddly enough, this act of killing another had been more kindness shown to them than anyone else had shown them for many years.

The village itself wasn't entirely pleased to have Scrooge back. The brother-in-law had tried to spin the story into a more favorable version for himself, but ultimately, Scrooge had done what he couldn't, so they had to pay.

Scrooge hadn't said a word as the brother-in-law tried to spin things. He'd simply glared coldly while contemplating how best to ruin the man's entire financial career.

It would take little effort to completely crush the man beneath his spatted foot. He'd do it without remorse for what was done to poor Marzia.

"I had to purchase special equipment for this job. I would have considered eating the cost myself had I been allowed to do my job unimpeded, but given the interference, you all will have to deal with the cost being passed on to you on top of the interference clause upcharge."

It was part of the contract he'd signed with the village's mayor. The clause was in there because of people stupidly trying to play at heroics...or trying to get out of having to pay him in the first place by making him do all the heavy lifting and then swooping in at the last minute to complete the job. Honestly, he wished he'd levied a higher surcharge given this town's attempt at hiding key information.

Of course no one was happy about this, but the contract was iron-clad. No getting out of it, even though they did their best to blame Brother-In-Law, and even Ratface - surely the Spells sent him to cause distraction and chaos! THEY should be the one paying for the upcharge! Of course, they were oblivious to the fact the special equipment came from those Spells...

But for all the hemming and hawing, they did finally fork over evert last bill that was promised.

Scrooge made a point of carefully counting out the money before pocketing it in front of the crowd, ensuring that he had every last penny.

He then looked towards the preacher. "You. Priest."

"Y-Yes?" the man stammered.

"Next time you attempt an exorcism, make sure you know what you're doing and -- most importantly -- why." Scrooge's eyes were flinty. "An exorcism is a tool for expelling demons from hosts. When cast on the ghosts of the mortal dead, it destroys them completely. Slowly. It's like taking a bath in a vat of acid with no way out.

"Because of you, Marzia Biancardi -- a member of your own flock -- lost the last shreds of her humanity, her only chance at passing on to Paradise. Now her father will never be reunited with his beloved daughter in the afterlife." He narrowed his eyes. "Keep that in mind the next time you stand at the altar...and when you finally stand before your Maker in Judgment."

With that, Scrooge stalked past the crowd.

It should have come as no surprise that whispers started as soon as his back was turned, not even waiting until he was far away enough not to hear. It wasn't their fault Marzia died! She took her own life! She wasn't woman enough to keep her man! She should have stuck around and made the marriage work! Maybe the Spells enchanted the husband to cheat, or enchanted the girl to take her life!

Nobody wanted to take the blame. But much to their frustration, Scrooge was on soul they couldn't blame - because he'd gotten rid of their problem. He'd done just as he was told, and there was no getting around it. What a bothersome man, to indulge in gossip and dig up old stories no one wanted to talk about. Good riddance to him.

Scrooge listened to the whispers. His mind darted to his normal business and remembered the petition from this village to help develop the area. It wasn't particularly wealthy to begin with, and Scrooge believed in helping others by providing opportunities for them to help themselves when possible. If he made money from the deal, all the better.

In a way, this incident showed him the true colors of the quaint little town he'd considered investing in. If this was how they treated their own neighbors, well, they'd be highly unlikely to treat outsiders any better. He would not subject his people to these vile creatures.

He pulled out his old flip phone and hastily typed a message in code to his Chief Financial Officer. As he kept walking, he heard the mayor's phone chime followed by a cry of dismay.

He didn't need to read the message that had been sent to the mayor's phone. He smirked as he kept walking.

After careful consideration, our CEO has declined to invest in your project. We here at McDuck Enterprises bid you good luck in your future endeavors.

Once more, no one would take the blame for the deal going south. It was Mariza's fault for haunting the village and scaring away potential investors! It was Brother-In-Law's fault for getting into an argument with Scrooge! It was the Spell's fault, they probably put a hex on the investment!

At this rate, the noonwraith was probably going to be the least of their problems. A village this dirty and despicable was likely crawling with ghosts and ghoulies from ill grudges and dishonorable ends. Which begged the question of who took care of all of that before? And why only now was an outsider taking the job?

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